We’re entering the final month of the year. It’s hard to believe another year of Thought Partners has come and gone!
As we begin to wind down the calendar year and prepare for untold adventures to come in 2026, you may be questioning how exactly you want to end this year and start the new. To that end, this month’s theme has us examining the power of well-intended and well-constructed questions.
I used to think questions were simply information-gathering tools. Then I realized: every question I ask is doing something with and to the person on the receiving end.
Questions require a response. That’s their power. But that also sets up their risk. Let’s investigate.
What Questions Can Do:
1. Questions can be statements in disguise. When you ask “Have you thought about x, y, or z?” what you might be telling the receiver is “I don’t think you’ve really thought this through.” It is a question, and it might also be disguised as a lack of confidence in their ability. Be sure you are aware of your intent.
2. Questions activate thinking. “How would you solve this?” does what “Here’s what you can do” never can. It transfers ownership from you to them and encourages their own problem-solving. Active thinking may yield to people relying on you less; not necessarily a bad thing.
3. Questions surface discomfort—and that too is not necessarily a bad thing. “How are things at work?” stings when things aren’t going well. “How did your test go?” burns when the result isn’t good. Questions surface discomfort in ways statements don’t, exposing root causes without triggering the defensiveness that shuts people down.
Ensure you ask well-constructed and well-intended questions that create useful discomfort—the kind that moves people forward rather than shutting them down.
The leaders I most admire understand this balance. They know when to ask and when to tell. They use questions to empower, not entrap.
So here are my questions for you: How are you leveraging questions in your leadership? And what might you be doing that is sabotaging your efforts?
