Think peer pressure is just a kid problem? Think again.
Peer pressure graduated to the workforce, but we call it something different.
Welcome to the Quest for Alignment.
The other day, a leader was reflecting upon a meeting they just left. They were off their game in our conversation, not as present as they typically are, so I scratched the surface a bit.
The 30,000-foot view was essentially that of the five people in the room; three of them agreed to move forward in one direction, and the other two felt they should move forward in a different direction. In the quest for alignment, my leader felt as though he ended up agreeing based on the pressure from his peers to conform versus the data that showed otherwise. Did he conform because of a persuasive argument, the possibility of another perspective, or a level of uncertainty in the outcome for both options? He wasn’t sure, but he knew he didn’t want the quest for alignment in the future to become a pattern of conformity.
It’s perfectly okay to be persuaded by others if the argument is convincing, if data shows a clear favorite, and if the market conditions dictate an alternative response in strategy or behavior. However, it’s important to not lose perspective or the practice of self-reflection, which is exactly what this leader was interested in processing.
How to Participate in Alignment vs. Conforming to Peer Pressure
1. To participate in self-reflection, you have to be self-aware, meaning you have to be aware of and notice external influences. It’s okay to be persuaded, but you have to do so willingly and with purpose. Anything other than that borders on becoming a bandwagon effect.
2. Understanding the use of “feedback”, or my preference, “information”, is critical as well. Question the use of this information. Is it being wielded to subjugate and influence to alter a power dynamic or is it neutral and allowing for conversation and debate?
3. Dig a little deeper into the culture. Is this typically a peer pressure type culture? Is the expectation that conformity is reached at all times, or is it okay to agree to disagree and return to the issue with more information? If you choose to conform willingly, there is accomplishment in reaching alignment. But it doesn’t work in the reverse.
The bottom line is pressure to agree, align, and conform surrounds all of us regardless of age or environment. The willingness to self-reflect, to be self-aware, and to have autonomy in our decision-making are the key distinctions in whether we’re aligned versus pressured.
